**music is our song, and very appropriate for this special**
Hey there everyone! Some of you may be wondering why it’s been almost a month since I’ve posted anything new, while the rest of you know exactly why! I assure you that I’m working on the Groves, but my real life, as it should be, has been my first priority this past few weeks. This chapter/special is in honor of the fourth of July, but is also a little sneak peek I guess at my real life and what I’ve been up to. I hope you all enjoy it!
Seeing him again for the first time was unreal to me. It was like the best dream I could have ever had, except for the fact it was real! As soon as he was close enough I ran up to him and wrapped myself in his arms, just to be sure it really was him. After six and a half months he was finally here, right where he should be.
“I’ve missed you so much.” I whispered, fighting back my happy tears. “I’ve missed you too, these next two weeks are going to be the best I’ve had in a long time.” he replied softly. I still was in shock, and didn’t want to let him go, but I knew our kids were going to be just as excited to see their Daddy as I was to have my husband home.
“DADDY!!!!” Rachelle squealed. She took of running in circles, but Daddy scooped her up in his arms tickling her. My heart melted watching her and him together. I was so surprised that she knew who he was even as young as she had been when he left. Toddlers learn so fast though I suppose, although she had grown she would never forget him.
She snuggled up against him, doing exactly what I had just done which was to try to imprint his smell and feel in my mind so that even when the moment ended I would still be able to hang on to it. He finally passed her back on to me so he could see how big his son had gotten, and how much better he was doing despite his autism.
“Hey Buddy! Wow, look how big you’ve gotten!” my husband said upon seeing our son. Typical of Bryan though he didn’t say anything just smiled real big and let Daddy hug him. At least this time he wasn’t shy about seeing him the way he had been just after my husbands basic training. This was a big step for him!
My husband held onto him as long as he possibly could, and Bryan let him. It was another big step for him seeing as most children with autism don’t like to be hugged or kissed or held. Our son was never really like that, but especially with his Daddy now who he had a very special bond with I think he was enjoying it just as much.
It felt so good to have us all together again. One big happy family! The kids got their time and I got mine, but between the visitors, and things that just had to be done, time passed quickly. With the fourth of July and Bryan’s 6th birthday just around the corner we decided to have our own little celebration one evening and set off some fireworks.
Of course I let Daddy have the honor of launching the fireworks and I kept the kids back at a safe distance. Everyone enjoyed the show, especially Rachelle who had been too young in years past to stay up and see the fireworks.
I know to many it’s just a pretty light show, but to me it means a lot more. My father was a Marine for 29 years and I lived the military life from the time I was born until I turned 21 and was no longer eligible to be a dependent. Then I married my wonderful husband who just in 2009 after our second child joined the army and once again I was back in the lifestyle I had grown up in. But this time was different. Being a wife and being a child are totally different roles and much different feelings too when in times of separation.
We spent every second we could with each other. Knowing that not much longer it would be time to say goodbye again. We have been married for almost 6 years and I can honestly say that we love each other more now that we ever have. Being far away sucks, but it can honestly bring you closer if you try. Being a family with my husband and our kids is the best thing in the world, and I couldn’t ask for a better partner. One who sacrifices himself for not only our family, but the entire countries freedom. As scared as I am for his safety at the same time I couldn’t be more proud of him. And I am so grateful to have him in my life. Of course that dreaded day finally came, and it was time again to say goodbye. I tried as hard as I could to keep myself together, but seeing tears in my husbands eyes was more than I could bare. I didn’t want to upset the kids, but I knew that it was probably inevitable. Bryan could sense something was wrong, probably before I even started crying. But being the tough little guy he is he would sniff back his tears. The only reason I even knew he was crying was I caught a glimpse of him wiping his eyes. Which of course made me want to cry even more! When it was finally time to let go I just couldn’t do it. I kept holding on and kissing him as many times as I could before I knew he just had to go. His plane was leaving soon and he would get in a lot of trouble if he missed it. I secretly prayed for bad weather so he could come home, but of course it was too late for that. I stood watching him walk away. I didn’t take my eyes off of him until he was gone out of sight. He hadn’t looked back, but I knew why. If he had he wouldn’t have been able to go. I know it’s just as hard for him, if not harder. Afterall I still have the kids who keep me busy and remind me of him every single day. Still it didn’t help the way I was feeling. My heart was once again broken in two pieces. The piece he took with him and the piece I still held in my chest. I literally felt as though it was ripped in two. It’s a feeling I will carry with me every day while he is gone, until the day he returns to us again, safe and sound.
I hope you all enjoyed this 4th of July special. I hope too it may shed a little light about what the meaning of this holiday is. So make sure you thank those who have and still are fighting to keep America free, because as the saying goes “Freedom is not free.”. Take it from someone who pays the price every day for it, and have a very happy Independence Day!