Maybe it’s the fact I’ve been pregnant consistently for the last 4 years or just the fact babies like to wake up at all hours of the night, but I, am, tired! It’s 3am and this is the 4th time I’ve been up with little Ezra! She is quite the handful! I will be so glad when she is a little older and sleeps a bit more through the night! I’m also beginning to re-think the whole 6 kids idea. I mean sure I have 3 so I’m halfway there, but that still means 3 MORE!
I guess I shouldn’t complain too much. Afterall my Mom is a big help! During the day she helps me keep the house clean and takes care of Ellie and Ezra. Thank goodness Eva is in school! A toddler and baby are surely enough to keep me and my Mom going through the day. Marc works about the same time Eva is in school so once she’s back home we are still even when it comes to the number of kids vs. adults!
“Waaaaa! Momma! Waaaaaa!!” I jumped up as I heard Ellie scream, what now?! She was always crying, no matter what, even if she wasn’t hungry or sleepy. I rushed to her as I always did of course, you never know with kids, she could have hurt herself or something this time. I was always afraid it would be the one time I ignored her something bad would have happened.
I scooped her up and snuggled her to my chest. “It’s ok baby, Momma is here. Are you ok?” I asked in a concerned voice. “Yeah Momma, I miss you.” Ellie replied in her cutesy little voice. How could I be mad at her for that?! Still it was quite annoying to get such a scare for something as simple as just wanting to be held. Seriously, her crys always sounded like she was getting eaten alive or something horrible, but she was always just lonely or bored. Hopefully when Ezra is old enough to play this will happen less often.
Speaking of, that day had finally come! Ezra’s first birthday! We invited the whole family, just about, over for the occasion! But not just to celebrate her birthday, it was also a little house-warming type thing. Mom did the honors, since she was such a proud Grandma and carried Ezra to her cake. We all sang and clapped and cheered in anticipation of the big event.
Mom blowing out the candles caused my breath to catch in my throat. It was really happening, my baby was growing up! I had a sick feeling in my stomach that I just couldn’t quite shake. I almost thought I was going to have to excuse myself, but I held on, I didn’t want to miss seeing my princess grow up!
She was absolutely perfect! Not that I expected anything different! Ellie looked a lot like Marc and well I think Ezra looks a lot more like me! Eva.. well let’s not bring that up shall we? Ellie and Ezra began playing together right away and reminded me a lot of me and Danielle. We had been twins of course so we were always together it seemed! At least as kids of course. Her and I had made up, but at least from what I had heard her and Cyrus were having their share of problems. I just hoped it didn’t have anything to do with me!
Mom went inside to entertain our guests with some of her incredible guitar skills! I was quite shocked seeing Aunt Candice was getting so old! It had been quite a while and I almost didn’t even recognize her! My Dad’s sister also made an appearance, both seemed to hang around with my Mom more than anyone else that evening.
I grilled out since I was the only vegetarian I knew if I wanted food I was going to eat I would have to prepare it myself! Not that I minded, our new house had a fabulous outdoor cooking area that even a girl like myself could appreciate! Which is really saying something since everyone knows I hate being outdoors!
Someone apparently liked my cooking so much she felt she had to clean everyone’s plate! I was pretty disgusted and shocked when I caught her doing this but I guess I shouldn’t be. She always seemed to be kind of sloppy, leaving her clothes on the floor even though the hamper was empty and literally right next to it. *sigh* I would like to think this is something she got from her father’s side of the family. Although to be honest I know nothing about him or his family.
It wasn’t long after Ezra’s birthday I began to have some strange syptoms which could only be attributed to one thing. I was pregnant— again! This one was different though, instead of horrible nausea I was absolutely famished all the time! I just couldn’t get enough food! I think my head was always shoved inside that refrigerator! This was not going to be good for my weight at all!
The harder I tried to resist food the more I ate! Mom told me she always heard boys make you hungrier than girls do. I don’t know if that was true or not but I truly hoped it was! I was hoping we would finally get a boy and maybe Marc would agree 4 was more than enough! I was really getting tired of being pregnant!
He was a sweetheart though, even as hard as he worked he still tried his best to help with the girls. Of course Eva pretty much took care of herself but Ellie and Ezra needed lot’s of attention! Without Marc and my Mom though I know I couldn’t do this alone! I would get tired so easily being pregnant, yet another reason I didn’t want to have anymore! I was ready to have my old body back as well as my energy!
Well except when I was hit with the “nesting” phase of pregnancy! The sudden urge to clean every inch of the house whether it needed it or not. This phase was as much a blessing as it was a curse! I also knew that this meant soon my pregnancy would be over and I would have yet another mouth to feed! In some ways I couldn’t wait for it to be over and in others I was dreading it!
Eva was excited though, she couldn’t wait for me to have the baby. She was getting close to being a teenager and she was constantly telling me how she would help take care of her little sisters, and hopefully soon to be little brother. I really appreciated the thought behind it but wasn’t counting on anything. Hopefully she would begin to develop some other interests in high school because as of now she had none.
One night after I finished cleaning up after everyone I decided to go to bed early. Well I should have known better because as soon as I sat down on the bed I got a stabbing pain in my abdomen. Of course I knew what it was right away, this was of course my fourth time going through it. So I gathered my clothes and went to find my husband.
Marc helped me waddle out to the car as fast as he could. I don’t know why but this time he seemed a lot more nervous to me. Which was strange of course, you would think the anxiety would lessen the more we did this. I knew of course what it was he was worried about, the sex. Although we would both love another little girl I know we both were hoping for a boy! So off we went to the hospital because ready or not this baby was coming!